THE TEMPEST
1 out of 5 stars
if you’d like to watch a naked ben whitshaw (but sans penis- where’s the fun in that?) float around in the night sky as a mischievous tree spirit for an hour and a half...then, this is the movie for you! :P uhh...this movie was WEIRD. i dunno how else to put it, but what a fucking weird movie... i thought it’d be a good weird, but julie taymor’s interpretation of shakespeare’s beloved tempest is very existentialism and makes you feel like you’re watching a shakespeare play after eating some ‘shrooms? this play is all about magic and fantasy and such, but it pushed the envelope into a whole nutha realm and was quite BORING... too bad b/c this one had a great cast lineup including the always fab dame helen mirren as prospera (gender change), chris cooper as the evil antonio, alfred molina as the drunk-ass stefano, russell brand as the dumb-ass trinculo, and djimon hounsou as the vengeful slave, caliban. who knew the words russell brand + shakespeare could ever be spoken in the same sentence? actually, he was really fitting as the dumb-ass trinculo, and i would actually prefer to see him MORE in other shakespeare remakes! i can’t believe i just said that... :P
if you’d like to watch a naked ben whitshaw (but sans penis- where’s the fun in that?) float around in the night sky as a mischievous tree spirit for an hour and a half...then, this is the movie for you! :P uhh...this movie was WEIRD. i dunno how else to put it, but what a fucking weird movie... i thought it’d be a good weird, but julie taymor’s interpretation of shakespeare’s beloved tempest is very existentialism and makes you feel like you’re watching a shakespeare play after eating some ‘shrooms? this play is all about magic and fantasy and such, but it pushed the envelope into a whole nutha realm and was quite BORING... too bad b/c this one had a great cast lineup including the always fab dame helen mirren as prospera (gender change), chris cooper as the evil antonio, alfred molina as the drunk-ass stefano, russell brand as the dumb-ass trinculo, and djimon hounsou as the vengeful slave, caliban. who knew the words russell brand + shakespeare could ever be spoken in the same sentence? actually, he was really fitting as the dumb-ass trinculo, and i would actually prefer to see him MORE in other shakespeare remakes! i can’t believe i just said that... :P
1 out of 5 stars
1 star b/c of alexander skarsgard’s hott bod AKA eric from true blood...this time with a nice tan and MUSCLES!!! the plot of this movie made absolutely NO SENSE WHATSOEVER. the only scene that made somewhat else was the ending...fortunately. everything else leading up to it was basically nonsense. why did david and amy (james marsden and kate bosworth) decide to fix up the house in the first place if all they were gonna do was workout and write a boring screenplay about WWII russia? also, why did charlie rape amy? and...why did anyone decide a remake of the 1970s version would do well in theaters?! :P ALL RELEVANT QUESTIONS...NONE OF THE ANSWERS REVEALED. alex skarsgard basically plays a non-vampire but beautifully tanned eric, and james marsden actually does a good job as pussy screenwriter and city kid david... dominic purcell AKA lincoln from prison break plays this pedophile/mentally retarded guy named jeremy, and that whole storyline meshed with david and amy’s storyline pretty much blows things out of proportion. (LITERALLY) this movie in some ways make southern folk look bad... in some ways, it would have been better as a comedy. ugh... :/
Posts
No comments:
Post a Comment