NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM: BATTLE OF THE SMITHSONIAN
2 out of 5 stars

where do i even begin with this one? even with an all-star comedian cast, this one just FAILS... a couple of actual funny moments sprinkled here and there, but none are truly worthy of a laugh... (save your laughter for something actually humorous...like OJ simpson trying to donate the suit he wore to trial to the american history museum, and getting rejected, haha!)


larry the museum guard (ben stiller) is back with his amigos, as he tries to rescue them from the evil kah-mun-rah, an egyptian pharaoh who wants world domination by unleashing his underworld army to the world. but, let me backtrack a bit... we find out that larry is now rich and CEO of a company that makes gadgets (think: home shopping network), and the objects at the natural history museum in nyc are about to get shipped to washington d.c. for the federal archives. (AKA the smithsonian) unfortunately, the magical tablet is shipped too, and kah-mun-rah awakes from his slumber... (this is the point where you realize you wished he hadn’t—i mean, i love hank azaria but that lisp/quasi-english accent annoys you to death) larry is joined by amelia earhart (amy adams) who becomes larry’s sidekick for this sequel, and owen wilson returns as jed, the miniature cowboy that won’t STFU!


of course, it’s all ridiculousness i.e. the lincoln at the lincoln memorial coming to life and saying the most clichéd of all lincoln quotes, the fact that the smithsonian keeps their storage facilities underneath the national mall, and robin williams as teddy roosevelt. it’s sad to see these stars of comedy reduced down to this, but hey...it was good publicity for us, right? one of these days the REAL story/behind the scenes of SI will be told... (hint, hint, wink, wink) well, my script won’t have figures coming to life, but i got to hand it to one great scene that will actually tickle the funny bone. it is when ivan the terrible announces to kah-mun-rah that he found two exhibited figures who want to join team evil... (hint: he’s green & he’s grouchy and the other sounds like he has asthma and wears a helmet)


with all that said, no to this one...and, no to you, OJ... for the last time, we (SI) do not want your suit! (nor would i ever want to see it come to life, EVER!!!) :P