THE GREEN HORNET
3 out of 5 stars

“let’s roll, kato!” – britt reid AKA the green hornet

i have to say, this was really well written and blended the sillyness of seth rogen’s films with a good action hero! the relationship between britt and kato is priceless, but i feel like it could have been funnier... maybe if they went with someone like ken jeong or jay cho? :/

so, who is the green hornet? britt reid (a slim seth rogen) is your typical, young, playboy douchebag AND the daily sentinel’s editor-in-chief’s son. he’s out trashing hotel rooms at LA’s standard, making out with random girls in his father’s cars, and hanging out in his awesome pool all day... one day, he’s out and about with his latest girl, and he hears about the death of his father on the TV inside of his hummer limo. while he’s at home grieving his father’s death, he suddenly realizes the coffee that he’s drinking is shit, and thus re-hires the mechanic/coffee maker...a guy named kato! (taiwanese pop superstar jay chou) kato starts to build and design weapons for britt, even a crazy decked out green hornet mobile AKA black beauty, and thus, the green hornet is born! of course, their “reputation” catches the attention of a ruthless euro criminal named chudnowsky (christoph waltz from inglourious basterds)... no, tschaikowsky? chowkowsky? hahahaha, you’ll understand once you see this... :P

i really like michel gondry’s films, esp. be kind rewind. this...it was well written and had some style to it, but i was hoping for a straight-up action film sim. to the style of iron man? not sure if seth rogen sold me on him being a superhero... i think i liked the characters of kato and chudnowsky more than the green hornet, himself. OMG, that scene with chudnowsky and danny “crystal” clear (cameo from james franco!) is PRICELESS. kind of wish that seth rogen would stick with movies like pineapple express and superbad, and leave the action hero genre to guys who can actually pull it off? kthankxbye... :P

THE MECHANIC
4 out of 5 stars

you know, jason statham is the very definition of a type-casted actor... if you were to open up a dictionary, i am SURE you would find his name next to the term “type-cast” esp. after you see this movie, where jason statham is yet AGAIN an assassin/hit man... :P

so, jason statham plays hit man arthur bishop, who works for a shady organization that has bishop on their payroll as a “mechanic”, someone who fixes their problems and takes out any targets this organization wants taken out. but one day, he encounters a conflict of interest when the organization he’s working for wants one of their partners taken out AKA his mentor, harry mckenna. (a wheelchair bound donald sutherland) turns out, harry betrayed and botched a hit on someone in south africa for a large sum of $, so the organization wants him eliminated. arthur goes through with the hit, but his guilty conscience gets the best of him, so he “adopts” harry’s son steven (a fiesty ben foster) as his apprentice. it’s no surprise that the two decide to go after the organization itself, but only after a few assignments first... ;)

this was totally a dude movie, so obviously anyone who’s a XY is going to love it... :P the action sequences are actually pretty good, and i really like how the first half of the movie is stylized with a color filter and grainy like texture. very 70s, and it fits well for a remake of a 1972 flick. (r.i.p. charles bronson!) high-octane, high-energy, and definitely takes you on for a ride with the mechanic... like i said, extra points for style and great sass from the one and only ben foster. LOVE that guy... ;)

COUNTRY STRONG
3 out of 5 stars

funny how when i actually have low expectations for a movie, i end up liking it! :O (LOVE the fact that it's set in the great state of TX!)  anyway, decided to give GOOP a try, as she plays a washed-up country singer, trying to make a comeback after several months in rehab...

i actually think this movie is the reason why gweneth got a role on glee in the first place! as i said: GOOP stars as washed-up/disgraced country music star, kelly canter, who checks out of rehab early to go on tour in the name of kick-starting her career again. nearly a year ago, kelly had fallen off stage drunk at a dallas concert, killing her unborn child with the fall... james canter (tim mcgraw), her manager and husband is over-bearing and controlling, esp. when kelly falls for young country music star beau hutton. (friday night lights’ garrett hedlund) she actually discovers beau’s talent while in rehab, and goes along as an opening act for kelly’s tour. but guess who else gets to go on tour with kelly too? gossip girl’s blair waldorf! well, not her exactly, but leighton meester with a horrible southern accent! she plays beauty queen turned country pop star chiles stanton, whose got the hots for beau and possibly for james...? so, will kelly make her big comeback? kind of obvious but the performance kelly gives is actually quite inspiring/good... ;)

extra star for garrett hedlund b/c that boy is FOINE esp. in that plaid... :P i thought this was decent enough, but needed to be more raw and more dramatic. maybe even racier esp. since this is afterall about the music industry, right? sex, drug, and country music, dammit!!! I WANT MORE OF IT ALL. is that too much to ask? enough of this PG-13 shit... if you’re gonna portray a tortured singer, might as well go ALL THE WAY... ;)

FROM PRADA TO NADA
2 out of 5 stars

i sort of had high expectations for this one because lionsgate helped produce it, but no... which is a damn shame! :/

adapted from jane austen’s famous novel sense and sensibility, two mexican-american sisters named nora (camille belle) and mary (alexa vega) dominguez lose it all when their father dies from a heart attack. (if you’ve ever read austen’s novel, nora is headstrong elinor and mary is obviously playful marianne) their awesome lives, shopping on rodeo drive and living in beverly hills are transformed overnight, when they’re soon kicked out of the house by their half-brother’s greedy GF olivia, and forced to live with their aunt in east LA. east LA is where mary and nora begin to re-connect back to their roots, and of course, find love in the process... mary ends up falling for edward ferris, her boss at work, and mary ends up falling for rich/sexy/handsome/all of the above rodrigo, who is her mexican literature TA at school. but are these guys the right ones for nora and mary? or the right question is... will nora ever let someone love her the way edward loves her, or will she just focus on her career? or...will mary ever see that homeboy bruno loves her the way she loves rodrigo? ohhh, love complicates all, doesn’t it? ;)

i thought this could have been produced better because it felt cheap. the quality of the acting to the stereotypes to the script... IT COULD HAVE BEEN BETTER. characters needed to be fleshed out because the overall story was actually decent and a good adaptation from austen’s original. the acting was very stale like a month old tortilla chip with the exception of the aunt and ican’tbelievei’msaying this... wilmar valderrama! he’s a badass homeboy painter in this one, which is a long way from his days as fez in that 70s show... except happy endings all around with this one. a little on the serious side as a rom com, esp. since the movie is essentially about a culturally insensitive bitch whining about how she wants to go back to bev hills via a rich husband... :P

X-MEN: FIRST CLASS
5 out of 5 stars

charles xavier: “listen to me very carefully, my friend. killing will not bring you peace.”

erik lehnsherr: “peace was never an option.”

as the brits like to say,”BRILLIANT!!” this movie is like the equivalent of the new star trek, where a fresh/young cast breathes life into the x-men franchise! with matthew vaughan (director of one of my faves- layer cake and another fave kick-ass) at the helm, actors who can actually act well i.e. james mcavoy and michael fassbender, this movie KICKS ASS... :)

the movie starts off in warsaw, poland in 1944. (i think many of you know where we’re going with this) young erik lehnsherr is separated from his parents at a concentration camp, and the gates to the camp begin to bend at erik’s will until a soldier knocks him out with the butt of his gun. sebastian shaw AKA klaus schmidt and nazi collaborator (an evil yet delightful kevin bacon) notices the young erik’s talent, and has him demonstrate his power in front of him. when erik can’t, shaw kills his mother. this sends him into a rage, inadvertently killing two soldiers in the process (they’re wearing metal helmets), and destroying all things metallic in schmidt’s kill room. in a nazi concentration camp, the anti-hero named magneto is born... fast-foward to 20 years later, and guess who is a nazi hunter (fassbender), traveling all over the world eliminating nazis, one by one? you guessed it, but erik isn’t exactly magneto yet. meanwhile, in upstate new york, a young charles xavier wakes up in the middle of the night to find an intruder in his gorgeous castle of a home. he finds a young raven in his kitchen, looking for food, and adopts her as his sister. later on, charles (mcavoy) becomes an expert on genetic mutation, doing his studies at oxford university, when the CIA recruit him to stop sebastian shaw from engaging the U.S. and then U.S.S.R. into WWIII. along the way, new recruits are introduced such as emma frost (january jones as betty draper in diamond form), azazel (this devil looking dude who teleports places), riptied (a male version of storm- maybe storm’s dad?! wouldn’t that have been awesome!), havok (army dude who can throw high-energy beams at people), angel (SHE CAN FLY! and spits fireballs...), a young beast, and my fave: banshee. (he can scream sound waves and shocks, allowing him to scream high-pitch frequencies AND FLY!)

like i said, if you liked the new star trek, you’re gonna LOVE this movie. the acting is really well done, and of course, the action sequences are pretty well produced as well. there are several plot holes, but i’m willing to forgive... also, the character of sebastian shaw needed to be fleshed out more, plus if he’s suppose to be magneto’s predecessor... kevin bacon makes a good villain, but they never explain why sebastian shaw wanted to destroy the world so badly. that’s why i think magneto makes the best villain OF ALL TIME because his hatred for humanity and his deep-seeded rage comes from the traumatic experiences of being in a holocaust survivor. james mcavoy makes the perfect charles xavier as the pacifist, and the two protagonists really make this one worthwhile... I CAN’T WAIT FOR THE SECOND ONE. BRING IT. PLEASE. :D

P.S. BEST scene hands down is sebastian shaw’s demise. don’t want to give it away, but that scene brings it all together... and that is why, ladies and gents, he is MAGNETO. ;)

LITTLE FOCKERS
2 out of 5 stars

“greg, are you ready to be the...godfocker?”
– jack byrnes

very cheesy and not the same as meet the parents or meet the fockers... disappoinment all around. how could a movie reprising the same EXACT characters from the first movie disappoint so much? i know, a bad script and a different director? :/

we begin where we left off with the focker clan. greg (ben stiller) is now a daddy with 2 beautiful kids, fraternal twins. his wife pam (teri polo) is a stay-at-home mom, and greg is now the nursing manager of a particular unit within his hospital. they live in chicago, and they couldn’t be happier. of course, jack AKA pam’s father and greg’s notorious father-in-law (the great robert deniro reduced to this crap role) can’t stop thinking about who will lead the family once he passes. deep down inside, he still disapproves of greg, but unlike the greg in the first movie, greg doesn’t care anymore. he’s got bigger problems such as hottie pharma rep andi garcia (jessica alba) and pam’s ex-BF kevin (a goofy owen wilson) who may still be in love with her after all these years. on top of all this, greg has to deal with his crazy parents, roz (barbara streisand) who is now famous and on TV with a sex-ed morning show and his father bernie (dustin hoffman) is learning how to do the flamenco in spain! crazy plot with only a few funny scenes...

not as funny as i hoped it to be! BRING JAY ROACH BACK, PLEASE. waaaay too cheesy and not enough wit. ben stiller is really whinny in this, whereas owen wilson actually does a good job as dumbass yet lovelorn kevin. the little boy is really cute, and i love the scene when he draws a picture of his family and it’s grandpa jack getting some help from daddy with his wee-wee. LOL, if that’s the funniest scene, imagine what the rest of the movie is like. netflix it if you like ben stiller or owen wilson, but otherwise, pass on this... :P

HARRY POTTER &
THE DEATHLY HALLOWS: PART 1
4 out of 5 stars

well... i’m just going to be frank, and say that i didn’t really like this adaptation at all. really really creepy moments and probably the darkest HP yet. actually those were the good moments! what i didn’t like about this was that it was just too LONG (a whopin’ 2 and a half hours, really?) and felt that the pacing was very slow. hopefully david yates (the director) will pick it up a la what he did with half blood prince? :/

for those who haven’t read the books... let’s recap for ya: HP7 is all about the horcruxes and destroying the evil wizard voldemort once and for all. the final battle between harry and voldy is going to be rough, so in order to get the upper hand, voldemort’s soul must be dealt with... apparently, a long time ago, voldemort decided to split his soul and put each piece into a horcrux, a mechanism to house it. harry destroyed one of the horcruxes AKA tom riddle’s diary when he battled the basilisk in the chamber of secrets. (book 2) so, harry, hermione, and ron are off to find them and destroy them. their journey gets thwarted by the now corrupt ministry of magic which is trying to get rid of the mudbloods AKA muggles (non magical ppl), the death eaters AKA followers/loyal subjects of voldemort and house of slitherin, and snatchers, who are bounty hunters hunting down muggles for the ministry, so they can interrogate them. the world which harry and his friends are living in is now a dark dark hell hole, and you can tell they’re a long ways from hogwarts...

maybe it was because i read the book, but i was extremely disappointed with this adaptation, as i’ve mentioned before... just too damn long and drawn out! but one thing i did like is that you realize this kids aren’t kids anymore. they’ve got to fend for themselves, and use magic to defend themselves because THEIR LIVES DEPEND ON IT. dumbledore can’t be savin’ no one this time. it’s the ultimate test of survival, and you see it when harry and his friends plan to break into the ministry of magic to retrieve one of the horcruxes or better yet, when harry and his friends are captured and tortured at the malfoy estate. one thing that bothered me a ton was dumbledore’s mysterious family history, and why the movie didn’t go too much into detail with that. strange since it’s pretty significant IMO... despite pacing issues and all, i think one of the best scenes though is the visualization of the story of the deathly hallows. BRAVO on that. for me, not as good as half blood prince, but maybe HP7 part 2 will change my mind this summer! ;)