ROCK OF AGES
4 out of 5 stars

you can pour your sugar on me ANYTIME, stacee jaxx! :P

ahh, the 80s... who could forget the music? the hair? sexy rockers like axl rose and bret michaels? do i even need to summarize the plot of this one? we start with a small town girl with big dreams of becoming a star sing her way from OK to LA (julianne hough- PERFECT for the role of sherrie IMO), where she meets barback drew (diego boneta- meh) after she gets mugged by some stringy-haired creep. (how dare he take her records!!! ::shakes fist::) as it turns out, drew works at the bourbon room (owned/operated by a really grossed out alec baldwin and russell brand), and sherrie too gets a job as a waitress there. the bourbon room also happens to be in major debt, and only one man can save it financially... STACEE JAXX. (tom cruise NAILS this role!) stacee has one last concert with his band arsenal before he goes solo, so... this also means major opportunity for drew as his debut as wolfgang von colt! (i know...what a stage name) of course, you have to have a “bad guy”, and in this case, it’s patricia whitmore (catherine zeta jones), wife of mayor mike whitmore, who HATES stacee...maybe because of her past? ohhhhh, stacee... he totally makes this movie! ;)

ridiculous, cheesy, another GAY FAVE of the year! (i mean, you got the director of hairspray directing this one!) i wouldn’t say it’s as good as hairspray, but it’s pretty well produced and good actors doing things out of their element i.e. tom cruise as a drunk-ass jaded rocker sex icon and he totally brings this one together. the storyline is shallow like a watered down drink at a crappy bar, but hey! who needs story when you have SINGING?  esp. songs from def leppard, foreigner, and journey?!  talk about a movie that ROCKS OUT WITH YOUR COCK OUT. see it now if you can handle the awesomeness of stacee jaxx. :P 

THE AVENGERS
5 out of 5 stars

“you’re missing the point!” there’s no throne. there is no version of this where you come out on top. maybe your army comes and maybe it’s too much for us but it’s all on you. because if we can’t protect the earth, you can be damned well sure we’ll avenge it!” – tony stark AKA iron man

A is for AWESOME! A is for ACTION-PACKED! A is for AMERICAAA!!! :) (can’t you tell i LOVED this?)

if you don’t know who the avengers are...you need to get yourself off from underneath that sheltering rock. :P just kidding... but in case you truly don’t know the story of the avengers, they are: capt. america (chris evans), iron man (RDJ), thor (chris hemsworth), black widow (scarlett johansson), hawkeye (jeremy renner), and of course...THE HULK. (mark ruffalo) nick fury (samuel l. jackson) and his crew S.H.I.E.L.D. are working in their lab when a cube of immense blue energy “activates”. it opens up some sort of portal, and out pops loki (tom hiddelston)! this time, he’s hellbent on destroying earth as part of his revenge on his brother thor who has sworn to protect it by bringing the tesseract energy cube to an alien race named the chitauri, who in return will help loki destroy earth. loki ends up putting hawkeye and the scentist erik selvig (remember him from thor?) under some brainwash spell, and they help him escape. director fury is then forced to initiate the avengers initiative AKA the superhero dream team. ;)

WITTY script, lots of action sequences, and if there’s a director who can pull off a good storyline...IT IS JOSS WHEDON. all around awesome movie, and the casting was brilliantly done. talk about the world’s most dysfunctional team! :P however, it doesn’t matter because in the end, the avengers will always have the earth’s back. and of course, iron man steals the show with his humor and wit. e.g.:

loki: “what have i to fear?”
iron man: “the avengers. it’s what we call ourselves, sort of like a team earth’s mightiest heroes type of thing.”
loki: “yes, i’ve met them.”
iron man: “yeah, takes us a while to get any traction, i’ll give you that one. but let’s do a head count here: your brother the demi-god; a super soldier, a living legend who kind of lives up to the legend; a man with breath-taking anger management issues; a couple of master assassins, and YOU, big fella, you’ve managed to piss off every single one of them.”

takethat, loki. :P